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[rollplayinghouse]

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[bluescreenwhitedragon]

[He notices the pause but doesn’t comment on it. Well. At least not directly]

Then you need to find someone who wants the same thing if that’s what you want.

[rollplayinghouse]

...

[She doesn't respond to that for a long time. But eventually:]

Is it really that hard? Even you have business partners and that kind of thing, right? Am I just that impossible to work with?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Stop.

This has nothing to do with you being impossible to work with.

And everything to do with your expectations.

You want someone you can rely on and be reliable to in return. All the while having a type that isn’t conducive to that. Joker does what he wants. A gets lost in him own head. And I prefer to not depend on anyone.

You can’t compare that to one of my business relationships. They’re completely different. We’ve sacrificed each other multiple times in games because it’s professional. The less feelings, the better.

[rollplayinghouse]

I'm not just talking about feelings right now. Even a professional relationship would be something! But I've always... worked alone.

And I'm still doing that now. Taisho didn't work with me. ZRAEL doesn't work with me, even though everyone claims we're a unit who helps each other out. C and X won't work with me. I don't have anyone I can count on like that. How is that a problem of my expectations?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Not anyone?

Didn’t that loudmouth pompous windbag of a Sun god stand up for you and did clean up duty after your Live?

Haven’t I, at your request, tried to involve you more in my work?

Hasn’t Man Eater accompanied you on more than one occasion through a potentially difficult situation?

[rollplayinghouse]

Pharaoh wants to spoil me because he thinks the team is his and he needs to take care of them and he's been neglecting me. That's still not working together. You have been trying, and I appreciate it, but I haven't really managed to be actually useful yet, have I? So there's no reason for you to rely on me as a real partner, and no reason for me to expect you to. Man Eater is definitely the one on the unit I can rely on most, but...

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

. . .

But?

[rollplayinghouse]

...But... he won't admit he wants someone like that too.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

And he won't ever admit it.

But he was happiest when he had Red to depend on.

[rollplayinghouse]

...

I'm not Red.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

I didn't say you were.

But fine. I'll spell it out for you---

In all his memories, he talked a big talk about being self-sufficient. But yet he was always in someone's company. And the only time he ever asked for help is if he would have died otherwise.

So if you're waiting for him to admit it, you're right. He won't. Move on.

But if you want ZRAEL to feel like a home -- because you don't really need everyone to like you. Just one will suffice. You could have a partner if you'd just lax those expectations of yours.

[rollplayinghouse]

...I know. I've seen some of his memories too. And he's definitely... the one I'm closest with. And I don't need to hear him admit it explicitly.

But I don't know... if I can be there for him.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

[Slightly exasperated:

No, wait. Actually exasperated:]

Why?

[rollplayinghouse]

...Because...

[trails off and has to think for a moment before she actually has an answer for that]

Because I admit it. It might be hard for him... so see me with what he wants.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Why don't you let him decide that?

That would solve two of your problems, wouldn't it? And with minimal risk on your part.

[rollplayinghouse]

...

[she sighs]

It's not like... I'm not trying.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

But it is also unsatisfying?

[rollplayinghouse]

...Not always.

But it's still frustrating sometimes. And it's not there yet.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Did you know that in the castle game was the first time that Angel and Duality really had a strong opinion on who they wanted to protect?

Sometimes things just take a lot of nurturing.

[rollplayinghouse]

[...]

For the Ultimate Child Caregiver, I may actually be pretty bad at nurturing.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Good thing your goal is not to raise children then.

[Though who knows if that's true or not. Considering who she has to deal with on a regular basis (aka this guy)]

[rollplayinghouse]

[rolls her eyes a little]

I think I'd be better at that than this.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Is that so?

Then I think you would get along better more with the naive and innocent types if that were true.

[rollplayinghouse]

Kids have a reason to be naive and innocent.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

That's debatable.